Grapegate!

I followed a trail of clues and solved a problem. I live in a house that rents out rooms. 
This morning I went to the bathroom to clean out a paintbrush in the sink. 
It quickly filled up with water. So I boiled a bit of water and poured it down to maybe free the obstruction. I could see a flash of purple when I gave a look with my bike light. 
So I turned both spigots on and furiously started doing the plunger businesses on this sink. 
Yes! I grabbed an emaciated grape. 
Still the sink was clogged so I plunged on. 
I was getting debris that I couldn't readily identify. 
I seemed like someone dissolved a cardboard box into the drain. Then I started making out that it was food. Former food to be precise. 
The smell informed me that It had already been in somebody. 
We live in a "Foodie" hot spot. I'm guessing someone over-imbibed and then puked into the sink during the night. 
I learned right away that the folks who rent rooms here are not shagging (those folks go to motels) or binge drinking. These cats came to eat. 
I'm more than happy to add another notch on my plunger handle for crazy stuff I have pulled up. 
The most exotic thing I ever found was the contents of a jar of pickles flushed down a Ptown warehouse commode. 
After lunch one day the receptionist had clogged the toilette the natural way. She then decided to add all the pickles knowing it was gonna be up to me to plunge. She never told me why she flushed the pickles. 
It was a red herring but I didn't know that. 
I cleared the situation and reported to her. 
"I found out why your pickles weren't going down...they were blocked by some turdlettes. Maybe next time you should flush the pickles first, then take a dump."
 LOL.

Understanding each other with wine, sushi, hot Ramen, whiskey and some very smart phones.

Olive has been trading lifestories. She doesn't speak Korean but her phone does. 

I thought we were all about Canadian Hippies last night, I was wrong.

 When i got home from clowning, i met some shaggy Canadians with guitars returning from Pickathon. Great folks.
I thought we were all about Canadian Hippies last night, I was wrong. 
Late at night I was in the back yard and heard our side door open. When I went to investigate I found nothing out of place but there were several yahoos across the street talking at me, I ignored them. I went to the front door and started punching in the code. 
I didn't have my glasses so I fumbled many times. 
Then the door opened from within. 
Inside our very dark living-room was a bald, gorgeous, black man in his tighty whities who was almost as tall as the ceiling. He let me in and put a finger to his lips (for me to be quiet) then pointed the finger out the window at the men across the street who were now approaching our pad. 
After that, he turned around and went into one of the rooms without a word. I guess he had been watching them in the darkness. 
They knocked, I answered and at 3 am or so 5 drunk dudes walked in loudly asking for beers, women and asking if I wanted LSD. 
It took me a moment to realize they were not at all affiliated with anyone staying with us. I was smiling but I was also loudly saying "Turn around dudes, you are in the wrong spot Yo. Get the Mcfuc out!" 
I shepherded them out of our place and watched them to make sure they kept going. Three of them started complaining that I was giving the boot but two of them mentioned how cool I was being under the circumstances. That was pleasant of them. 
I woke up next morning and couldn't ask any questions because now the rooms are full of lovely Ballet dancers from Seattle.  
They knew nothing about what I just told you. 
 how it goes. Thanks mysterious stranger for letting me in last night. That was clutch that he knew the difference between me and some drunk yahoos.

Hope ya got some laughs from this blog
Like what we do?
We live out of a tip jar (sometimes chicken sometimes feathers) if you are in a place to keep our sunny side up and rubber side down then feel free to drop off a donation at our website.
http://oliveanddingo.com/donate/


Thanks! It's a great town to be a clown.